Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
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