Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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