You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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