i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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