I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Let's get the cat blown out
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
