So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Panties = found
Randomize
