do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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