Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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