I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
