he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize