she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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