i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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