He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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