Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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