Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
