guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
