I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
my penis made a compromise with my morals
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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