I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
