bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
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