He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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