do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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