The maid of honor just puked.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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