you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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