You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
