so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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