i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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