Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
