I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
