Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
