Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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