I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Randomize
