that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize