You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
