woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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