i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
