so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize