how can u be prego again
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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