I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There r osticjed everywhere
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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