I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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