I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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