Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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