I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize