Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
