mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
