You can't motorboat a personality
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
