i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
