Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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