Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
