that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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