I can tuck mytits in my pants
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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