I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize